


Vampire Hunting Shenanigans

by writers_block_is_my_quirk



Series: Truce (IZ High School AU) [1]
Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Aged-Up Dib (Invader Zim), Alternate Universe - High School, Gen, Hypnotism, I'm on mobile and rich text decided not to work so we just don't get any italics in here today, Mind Control, Mind Manipulation, Short Zim (Invader Zim), Tall Dib (Invader Zim), Vampires, alternate title: two dumbasses and a dumbass robot fuck up, but not at school they're just teenagers, could be read as either ZADR or ZADF idrc, he's rly just taller than zim lol, they're probably 17 or 18 in this, which sucks bc I'm a dramatic bitch
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-13 01:34:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29394162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writers_block_is_my_quirk/pseuds/writers_block_is_my_quirk
Summary: Dib and Zim go vampire hunting together, but when they put their trust into the wrong man they have to face the consequences. Then, Dib forgets an important rule about vampires.
Relationships: Dib & Zim (Invader Zim)
Series: Truce (IZ High School AU) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2186370
Comments: 3
Kudos: 12





	Vampire Hunting Shenanigans

There's always a valuable lesson to be learned from every experience.

Today, Dib and Zim learned to never take GIR cryptid hunting with them.

Had the little robot eaten just the cloves of garlic they'd packed, they might have been willing to forgive him. They did not account for him eating the wooden stakes and the crucifixes too, however. 

Dib momentarily wondered whether GIR had technically committed blasphemy by eating the religious symbols, but he filed that question away for later- right now he was focused on getting the hell away from the angry, hungry vampire that was gaining on him. 

When the vampire attacked, Zim ran in the opposite direction, GIR tagging along. Maybe it was the fact that Dib was the only human, or maybe he was just having the shittiest luck, but the vampire paid no mind to the alien or his robot and focused his full attention on Dib.

Dib took a sharp turn into a hallway, hoping to lose the vampire, but his traitorous wet shoes squealed against the tile floor with each step, giving away his every move. If he couldn't run he figured he could try hiding, so he ducked behind a grandfather clock, holding a hand over his face to quiet his breathing.

"Hiding won't do you any good," the vampire called, stepping into the hallway. "I can hear the beat of your heart, pounding in your chest." The footsteps grew closer, to Dib's horror. He had nothing to defend himself with and nowhere to run.

The footsteps stopped right in front of the clock. Dib held his breath, willing his heart to shut up, just for one second please. Of course, it did no such thing, because he was still alive. Not that that would last much longer at this rate.

Dib felt a cold hand seize his shirt by the collar and yank him out from his hiding place. He found himself face to face with an old man, pale and wrinkled. The expression on the vampire's face could only be described as animalistic, a huge contrast to the friendly smile he wore not even an hour ago when he invited the boys into his home. They were naive to accept his offer, but they'd been searching for the rumored vampires in the area all day and needed a rest badly.

The vampire grinned, his eyes glowing an angry red. Dib was no idiot (at least he didn't consider himself to be one), he'd researched vampires for a full month and knew all about their tricks. Still, the part about hypnotism slipped his mind while he desperately tried to wriggle out of the man's grasp. He didn't even have time to look away before he was captured in the vampire's gaze.

Despite his pitiful attempts to fight it, Dib's body immediately went slack and his head was filled with a thick fog. He couldn't remember why he was struggling in the first place, and he found it easier to just stop. He vaguely registered himself being shoved against a wall.

The vampire said something he didn't really process, but understood anyways. Dib obeyed his request, tilting his head to the side to expose his neck. His eyelids drooped as the man leaned in close, and-

Zim had been running for at least ten minutes, and he hadn't seen that beast even once since he split up with the Dib. He felt like he should be relieved, but it felt more like losing track of a spider after leaving to get the bug spray. GIR ran down a random corridor long ago, but Zim didn't worry much about that, because out of the three of them he was probably the least at risk- unless the vampire didn't mind a victim without any blood.

His attention was caught by a loud THUMP from the next corridor over. He went to investigate, peeking past the wall.

He saw Dib, pinned against the wall. What was even more alarming was that he didn't seem to care, just looking straight ahead with a glassy, unfocused, tired stare. Zim thought to himself, have the Dib's eyes always been that… red?

"Show me your neck," the vampire commanded. To Zim's shock and horror, the Dib just obediently tilted his head. Did he have a deathwish!?

Zim realised he would have to put a stop to this himself as the vampire began to close the gap between himself and Dib.

"DIB-HUMAN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" he yelled, lunging at the pair with his PAK legs. He landed on the vampire's chest and started clawing at its face, leaving a dazed Dib on the other side of the room.

"What's going on… Zim?" Dib asked groggily.

"Oh, nothing really human. I'm just FIGHTING FOR OUR LIVES! Make yourself useful and HELP ZIM!" Zim screamed in reply between giving and receiving punches.

The vampire's eyes glowed red like before, but they didn't have an effect on Zim.

"What are you supposed to be anyways," the vampire hissed at Zim. "Some kind of bug-child?"

"I AM A HI SKOOL STUDENT, NOT A CHILD! FOOLISH URTH SCUM!" The vampire took the opportunity to throw Zim off of him while he was busy screaming. Zim flew across the room and hit the wall hard enough to stun him momentarily.

"Now, where were we..." The vampire wiped himself off, approaching the still very confused human. His eyes shined a bright ruby red once again, and it only took a moment to bring Dib back under his spell.

"Before I drink every drop of blood in your mortal body, I have a task for you. Squash that little bug for me, will you?" Dib got up slowly and walked over to Zim's recovering form. He towered over him, even when Zim was standing.

"Dib-stink?" Zim squeaked. There was no recognition in Dib's eyes, just the dull red Zim assumed signified some sort of mind control. It felt like an eternity before Dib finally made the first move, launching at the alien's antennae. He managed to grab one despite Zim's dodging attempt and he yanked it hard. Zim screeched and his PAK legs emerged, a natural instinct when an irken felt threatened. 

If I can just snap him out of it again, he thought. He grabbed Dib's (exceptionally large) head and slammed it into the wall, hoping it didn't damage his pitiful human brain organ too badly.

The vampire let out a long laugh. "Giving your friend a concussion won't help at all," he taunted. "It is me who controls the bond. And unfortunately for you…" He smiled deviously. "Dib, protect me at all costs."

The human immediately inserted himself in the space between the alien and the vampire, fists balled at his sides despite his vacant expression.

"Your little friend here will see to it that you don't even get close to me."

Zim dodged various attacks from Dib, wracking his brain for any possible solutions. He recalled one of Dib's excited tangents from a few days ago. 

"The thing about vampires is that they seem super strong, but they actually have a bunch of weird weaknesses like sunlight and garlic! Isn't that weird?"

His PAK's internal clock told Zim it was 6:24 AM. All he needed to do was hang on for a few more minutes, and then…

That monster was going to regret all of the large windows in his corridors.

Dib caught him off guard with a kick that sent him right into a wall. The vampire and the hypnotized boy backed Zim into a corner.

"This is where it ends, bug." The vampire said. "I admit, I haven't been this entertained in a long time. However, I'm getting hungry." He placed a dagger into Dib's hands. "Finish the job."

Dib knelt down to Zim's level and raised the dagger high above his head. Zim pulled on the curtains of the nearest window and shut his eyes tight, hoping he'd stalled enough time for the sun to rise. 

The scream of agony he heard seconds later was the most relieving sound he'd ever heard. He opened his eyes to find the vampire gone, replaced by a pile of dust on the floor. 

"Zim?"

Dib lowered the dagger, confused.

"YES! Zim is a GENIUS!" Zim cheered.

"What happened? The last thing I remember is… Oh." Realization dawned on the human. "How could I be so stupid!? One of the most basic rules of vampires is to never look them in the eyes, and I blew it!"

"There there, human… Your inferiority can be forgotten, if you buy me skittles." Dib punched him in the shoulder playfully.

"Friends usually tell each other things like 'it wasn't your fault', you ass." Zim thought about that for a moment.

"Hmm… No, it was definitely your fault!"

"I know, but shut up!" Another playful shoulder punch.

The boys gathered the dust in a ziploc bag and soon went on their way back to Dib's car with GIR. They began the 3 hour drive home in relative silence, until Dib piped up.

"...Thanks for saving me back there, Zim." he muttered. "You could have just ran off and left me to die, so thanks.

"I only saved you because I don't know how to operate these primitive ground-voots!" Zim retorted.

"Sure, Zim."

"So is this dagger mine now, or…"

**Author's Note:**

> Hypnosis is my favorite trope! I'm sad to see so little of it in this fandom so I'm doing it myself even though I'm not that confident in my writing. Please tell me what you think! (By the way, this takes place in the au where they become friends in high school, in case you were confused about why they were friends)


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